Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
