is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
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