you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Randomize
