Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
