I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I think my fart just growled at me.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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