Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
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