guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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