I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Randomize
