sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
