who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Randomize
