he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize