Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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