Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
her vagine was all disorganized.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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