I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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