You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
You are a genius and a whore.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
