Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
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