Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
