This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
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