It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
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