So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize