Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
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they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
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He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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