I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
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