you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
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