I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
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