I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
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