I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
I just found puke in my bra..
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed