But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Randomize
