im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Randomize
