you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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