but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Is it because I queefed?
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
