another moral hangover. fuck.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize