rhymes with "ouble enetration"
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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