In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
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