you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
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