its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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