Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
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I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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