ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I FOUND THE LEGS
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Randomize
