you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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