it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
