I heard we made out
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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