Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
