New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
she looked like the before picture.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I have peed in a lot of sinks
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Help. Why am I so naked?
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