last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
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