I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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