you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
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