I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
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