So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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