absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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