how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Randomize