Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
