No awkward lesbian experiences without me
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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